Eye mull of mush sheen

Everyone do me a favor and say that quickly in a very loud voice. Today at church, my friend Naomi brought a card from Mad Gab. In case you've never played that game before, there are cards that have a bunch of words that sound like other words. You are supposed to say the words and guess what you're trying to say. The words above make "I'm a love machine." She succeeded in getting my dad, Poodle, and two missionaries to say it out loud over and over again. It was pretty funny. So we had my dad walking through the hall saying, "I'm a love machine. I'm a love machine. I don't get it." Hilarious.

What does my mom think of me?

(Christmas morning, I open a box with a red silky shirt in it.)
Ashley: That shirt looks like lingerie.
Mom: I know. Why do you think I gave it to Shady?

(Looking at a shoe advertisement)
Mom: Ballerina flats. Those look cute.
Me: Yeah, but I don't look good in them.
Mom: Oh, yeah. That's because you have cankles.

(This morning)
Me: Do I have a big butt?
(Mom looks up at me and starts to laugh)
Mom: Wow, yeah, you sure do.

I think I get it from my dad

And by "it" I mean my dancing and coordination skills.
Apparently, at my dad's company's Christmas party this weekend, he decided to steal the spotlight and perform his Russian dance in front of everyone. However, he lost his balance and did a somersault backwards into the crowd of spectators. Thankfully, he's Michael el Jefe and everyone still thought he was cool. And who wouldn't? He's 52 and can still Russian dance. That might be even more cool than riding into the party on a donkey. Way to go, Dad the Bad.

From What about Bob:


I'm FREE!!!!!


I'm done with ALL my assignments. No more Spanish paper, no more Anthropology anything! Now all I have to do is sit on my butt and feel it grow (and then work it off after New Years). Yay!

Some of my favotite foods

ice cream
shakes
yogurt
cereal
milk
cheese
cream cheese
sour cream

So I don't even have to say what an unpleasant surprise it was to find out this weekend that I'm lactose intolerant.

Mom is hilarious

(on the phone a couple weeks ago)
Me: Sean's roommates are funny. Yesterday they were talking about how they like cute girls more than hot girls.
Mom: Oh, really?
Me: Yeah, apparently, hot girls have no personality.
Mom: So you're just cute? Well, my daughters aren't just cute. My daughters are hot. I hope you tell them that some hot girls do have personality.

And Poodle, I am a good cook. I made enchiladas this week and Sean said they were so good I'm practically Mexican.