Poor Shady, tough decision

Say that in a french accent and it makes way more sense. 

Anyways, I have come to a point where I actually do have a tough decision to make. My sewing machine broke today.  It has broken twice before-- one was something that we got fixed a few years ago, and the other time was last week and Brandon managed to fix it.  But this time it won't even turn on, and I'm seriously considering whether it would be worth it to get it fixed.

From a financial standpoint, it doesn't make sense to get it fixed.  My machine was worth $320 brand new, four years ago.  The first time I got it fixed, it was sent out for 2 weeks and cost me $95. That's almost a third the cost of the machine.  This was a very minor repair, too.  Who knows what it would cost now, or even if I could find someone to fix it.  Buying a new machine isn't something I would care to do now, either.  (Honestly.  I broke a $300 machine twice.  Just imagine what I would do to a cheap $100 machine.)  Also, in this day sewing only saves you money on clothes if you don't know how to get clothes on sale.  And I'm so good at getting clothes on sale.

I don't really love sewing. It's tedious. It takes up SO MUCH ROOM that I just don't have.  I also don't have that much time for hobbies, and to be honest I would love to just focus on painting, because that one gets neglected a ton. But one thing I do love that would be hard to leave behind is the creative aspect of sewing.  I love that I made Charlie's crib bumpers.  I love that Brandon reupholstered two chairs for our house.  I love that Violet can come with me to the fabric store and pick out exactly what she wants and wait in tense excitement as I finish each stage of her new dress.  I really love that I never have to throw any peice of clothing out because it doesn't fit perfectly. 

But even that becomes a problem.  I buy so much fabric for projects that never even get started.  I buy clothes that don't really work on me because I always assume that I can just fix them.  I waste so much money and thought on things that will never get done that it almost excites me to imagine what it will be like to never think about sewing.

It will be sad for me to think that I won't be able to sew Violet a Halloween costume this year.  But I've decided that putting away the sewing machine and thinning out my piles of fabric, at least until I have the space, energy, and money to commit to it again, is the best idea.

Why I'm going to like 25

I have this weird fear of getting old.  I can't really justify it, but I was a little distraught about turning 25 because I can no longer say that I'm in my "early twenties."  (I know 25 isn't old.  I just liked being super young.)  But sometime in that past few weeks I came to terms with turning 25 and decided that it's going to be my favorite age yet.  Here's why:
-- I can hang out with 30somethings and they don't feel like they're babysitting me. At the same time, 21-year-olds don't view me as a mother figure.
-- I've figured out how to have kids but not let them define my life.  The day before my birthday, my friend was talking about how she sees 21-year-olds with a baby but very little other life experience and she said, "I'm so glad that wasn't me."  So, teasing as I always do, I replied, "So you're saying you're glad you're not like me?"  Imagine my surprise when she said, "But you have so many other interesting things you do that don't involve having kids." Right then I did a victory dance and took a bow in my head.
-- I'm much more comfortable with my life than I was when I was 21.  Back when I first had Violet, when I would get the question "What do you do?" I would say "I'm just a mom" and secretly wish I had something more interesting to say.  Now when I get that question, I can say, "I take care of my kids."  And I don't really care what anyone thinks, because if they don't consider that work then they've obviously never been around my kids.
-- I've stopped feeling inadequate for not doing all the things that other moms and the internet tell me I should be doing.  A few months ago, I found this blog post that listed 10 things you should be doing every day to maintain order in your house.  It tried to feed me crap like waking up early, going to bed early, and getting an entire load of laundry done--start to finish-- each day.  A younger Lindsey may have been sad and discouraged and thought, "I'll never stay on top of things.  I love sleeping in too much. Boo hoo."  But instead I scoffed and said, "I am a GROWN UP!  NOBODY tells me when to go to bed!"

Maybe that should be my motto this year.  I am 25.  I am a grown up.  NOBODY tells me what to do.

Oh yes.  I'm going to love this age.

Have a great day

If you're ever weighed down by the cares of the world, you can sleep soundly at night knowing that Charlie has just discovered fans.

Misadventures of our trip

If you've been following my blog for any amount of time, you'll know that I don't feel the need to portray my life as perfect.  So how could I post about our camping trip without including all the things that didn't go our way?  I couldn't.  So here goes.  And I should warn, if you're uncomfortable hearing potty stories, stop reading.  Now.

We stopped at Horseshoe Bend by Page, AZ on our way out of the Grand Canyon.  At this stop there was a breathtaking view of one of the goosenecks of the Colorado River.  Unfortunately, there were no bathrooms and NO trees to hide behind.  Violet and I had both been in the car for hours and had to do our business when we got there. I had to resort to squatting over Violet's froggy potty (yes, we brought a toddler toilet on our trip) INSIDE the car, since there was no cover outside.  I thought I would be safe in there, but just as I got bare-bummed, another car with 4 passengers and no tinted windows pulled up right beside me and parked there.  In this situation there is really only one thing you can do: avoid eye contact.  I dodged glances like a pro.

When I caught up to the rest of my family, Violet informed me that she had to go, too.  She is really good at doing her business in the wild, but I was a dummy and forgot to take her skirt all the way off.  So, she peed all over it, and I spent the rest of our time at Horseshoe Bend holding a peed-on skirt and following around a toddler wearing only a shirt, a camelbak, and panties.

We are back

We just got back from our 2-week, 4,000-mile camping trip.  I got a lot of different reactions when I told people about our plans, but most involved people calling me crazy, brave, or saying that it wasn't a real vacation.  I'm sure many wondered whether the trip would be worth it for me, and to be honest, I wondered that before we left, too.  There are a lot of things that can go wrong on a camping trip, and a lot of things did go wrong.  I know that camping isn't exactly everyone's thing, and I wouldn't advise everyone else to take this trip.  But one thing I realized when we were out was that there really is no other way to see the world the way we did.  These are not places you can see by taking a flight and staying at a hotel.  It's going to be hard, because anything in life that's really worthwhile is.  But is it worth it?

 

YES!

 

I got to see my daughter experience the Grand Canyon for the first time.  She loved it.

 We were able to play on the beautiful dunes of White Sands national monument (this was one of the kids' favorite stops).

 I learned that my three-year-old is one of the best hikers I've ever met, simply because she loves climbing over rocks so much.

And all these were only a few moments out of our trip.  It was amazing.